Dry Humor Is
“Three’s A Crowd”
Dave Osborne is in Mick Foley’s office to plug his show. Apparently, Foley is letting Osborne book one match tonight. I don’t think it’s a bad idea for TNA to test out it’s booking options at this point, so I’m all for this idea (sarcasm). Jay Lethal barges in, wondering where Hogan is. Jeremy Borash asks Osborne if he reads Twitter. Osborne reveals that he doesn’t have a Twitter or a Facebook. This is nothing but a good thing, as if Osborne gets the book, he won’t worry about swerving us internet fans.
Mick Foley makes his way to the announce table. He talks about how he wasn’t well-informed about the partnership with Hogan.
Match #1: Dr. Stevie vs. Abyss
Stevie runs into a boot. Abyss is going for quick pin attempts. Stevie clips Abyss’ knee and connects with a superkick. Abyss hits a Black Hole Slam but when he goes for the pin, the lights go out. When they come back on, both men are down. Stevie crawls over and covers Abyss for the win at 2:17. Stevie gets to stay in TNA. What really matters here is the post-match happenings. The match was inconsequential. *
Stevie tries to utilize a chair after the match but Foley stops him. The lights go out again…FIREBALL TO FOLEY…lights on….IT’S RAVEN!!! He hits the Evenflow DDT on Foley and celebrates with Stevie. I will never complain about seeing more of Raven on my TV. It also is nice that he has some history with TNA and Stevie.
In the back, Stevie says that he’s here to stay. Raven talks about how much fun Abyss and himself are going to have in a wacky promo.
Next Thursday, Sting will give his thoughts on the Hogan situation.
Match #2: Alissa Flash vs. Traci
Flash works over Traci’s right arm and hits a shoulderbreaker.. Mike Tenay reveals that Traci’s right arm has been handicapped since birth. What else does Tenay know that we don’t? If I’m Taz right now, I’m a little on edge about my broadcast partner. Flash locks on an armbar for the victory at 1:43. Totally one-sided and just used to start an angle that no one will care about. ¼*
Traci attacks after the match, swearing multiple times while doing so. She is clearly upset that Flash CROSSED THE LINE by attacking her injured arm. You know what Traci? This is TNA, where wrestlers are encouraged to cross the line. If you don’t support this company, as Dixie Carter said last week, you can find another place to work! Rant over, I’m done with this!!!!
Match #3: Jay Lethal vs. Jim Neidhart
Neidhart backdrops Lethal and the crowd chants “you still got it”. I actually cannot believe I am watching this right now. Lethal avoids a charge and lands a double ax handle from the top. Lethal walks into a clothesline and Neidhart hits a powerslam for the win at 1:30. Use your imagination to figure out what my rating means. FTS
Lashley is in the middle of an interview backstage before he gets called to the production truck. Scott Steiner is on a TV in the truck cutting a promo from Lashley’s hotel where Krystal is staying. Lashley takes off for the hotel.
Dave Osborne and Jeremy Borash talk about Foley’s injury. Osborne wants to go see Foley buy Borash thinks they should stay. Osborne tells Borash to book a match in honor of Foley. Borash wants the X Division. GIVE THEM 2 MINUTES TOO WHILE YOU’RE AT IT!! Sorry for that outburst but I deserve to have a few of them.
Match #4: Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne, Lacey Von Erich, and Awesome Kong vs. Taylor Wilde, ODB, Sarita, and Tara
The faces control Rayne. Von Erich takes over on Sarita as we go to commercial. Back from the break and Sarita is still being worked over. She makes the tag to ODB, who lands some corner charges followed by a bronco buster on Sky and a fall-away slam on Rayne. Wilde tries to take down Kong but falls victim to the Implant Buster. The heels pick up the win at 7:09. This match received a decent amount of time and everyone looked fine. Unfortunately, half of the match was a commercial break. *½
Dave Osborne gives the X Division a pep talk about putting on a good match for Foley.
Lashley busts into his hotel room. Krystal is there and nothing out of the ordinary happened…UNTIL STEINER ATTACKS LASHLEY FROM BEHIND WITH A PIPE! Steiner tells Lashley to “look at your baby, it has my eyes”.
Kurt Angle comes down to the ring. He talks about how his match this Sunday could be the most important of his life. He has no respect for Desmond Wolfe. He has recovered from the lariat and at Turning Point, Wolfe’s wrestling career will be terminated. Wolfe appears on the big screen from a bar. He says that he’s not here to beat Angle, he’s here to hurt him. Angle tries to talk to Wolfe, but Wolfe is ignoring him. It turns out the video was pre-taped, as Wolfe appears behind Angle in the ring. Angle ducks a lariat and gets some shots in. He slams Wolfe against the guardrail but misses a chair shot. Wolfe DDTs Angle on the floor and connects with a chair shot. Wolfe stands tall as we go to commercial.
Match #5: Chris Sabin, Alex Shelley, and Amazing Red vs. Homicide, Sheik Abdul Bashir, and Kiyoshi
The heels attack before the bell. They take over on Shelley, with Kiyoshi hitting Sole Food. Homicide tries to use a barbed wire baseball bat and security stops him. Shelley flatlines Bashir into the turnbuckles and makes the tag. Red lands a double dropkick from the top and connects with some spin kicks. Red spikes Kiyoshi off a tornado DDT and follows with a corkscrew dive to the outside. The Motor City Machine Guns hit a splash-neckbreaker combination on Bashir for the victory at 4:30. Decent for the time given. I’m unsure what they were trying to do with Homicide as far as the barbed wire bat was concerned, but I wish we would have gotten some better build towards the Homicide/Red match this Sunday. **
Lauren is with Desmond Wolfe. Wolfe is here to replace Angle. He is younger, better looking, more determined, and healthier. Angle’s career will be ended this Sunday.
Team 3D and Rhino make their way to the ring. Ray talks about his choice to use a chair against Matt Morgan and Hernandez last week. He’s glad that he made that choice and tells Rhino that he’s sorry for not believing him. They are going to hold the younger talent down. Matt Morgan and Hernandez come out. Ray makes fun of them. Hernandez says they took everything they have because they can. Ray issued a challenge for a six-man street fight at Turning Point and asks if they have a partner. Morgan says they don’t need one but then D’Angelo Dinero’s music hits. Dinero announces that he is their partner but Morgan and Hernandez don’t look too convinced.
Lauren is in the back with the British Invasion. Their suspension has been lifted and if Beer Money beats them tonight, they will gain entry into the title match on Sunday.
Jeremy Borash is with AJ Styles. Styles apologizes to Daniels because it’s obvious someone else has been attacking him. Samoa Joe’s head games aren’t going to work anymore.
Match #6: Doug Williams and Brutus Magnus vs. James Storm and Robert Roode
Beer Money clothesline the British Invasion to the outside. The British Invasion realize they can’t take the countout loss because Beer Money will get into the title match at Turning Point. Magnus trips up Roode and the British Invasion takes over. Roode hits a double blockbuster and makes the hot tag. Storm cleans house. He hits a rope-assisted DDT on Magnus. Beer Money hit a double team suplex on Williams followed by another double team on Magnus. Williams stops Magnus from using a chair. This distraction allows Beer Money to hit the DWI on Magnus to move onto Turning Point at 5:12. The match was good and the crowd liked the overall result. However, the critical side of me wants to nitpick about how the TNA World Tag Team Champions lost in five minutes and how one of the bigger matches on the pay per view was changed three days before the actual event. **
Jeremy Borash is backstage with Morgan, Hernandez, and Dinero. Hernandez says he can’t trust someone that wears sunglasses all of the time…he could be shady. Oh Hernandez, you and your dry humor. Dinero tries his best to give them some reassurance.
Lauren interviews Daniels. He seems a little bitter but says that him and Styles will always be friends. He complains about the lack of support he has and states that he is just as good as Styles.
Match #7: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles
Styles catches Joe with a dropkick. Joe tosses him into the corner and connects with a facewash kick. He follows with a powerbomb and locks in a STF. Styles almost finds an opening but walks into a clothesline. Styles connects with a spin kick but Joe back drops out of a Styles Clash attempt. Styles lands a pele kick and goes to the top. Daniels appears on the apron and Styles punches him. The distraction allows Joe to synch in the Coquina Clutch for the win at 4:33. This featured the solid back and forth that you would expect out of these two. Obviously, I have a problem with the duration of the match. At the end of the day, this was just a way to create more dissension between Styles and Daniels going into Turning Point. **¼
Overall: This was a pretty poor show leading into Turning Point. The only part I thoroughly enjoyed was the Angle/Wolfe segment, and that is credited more to the individual personalities than the booking. Nothing on here really convinced me that I should order Turning Point. The in-ring quality was a little better this week but there was nothing that would lead me to believe I would be getting great in-ring quality on Sunday. TNA is capable of showing their fans this, just look at the Styles/Angle match heading into Bound For Glory. Bad “go home” show.
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